Tara Mohr’s book “Playing Big: Practical Wisdom for Women Who Want to Speak Up, Create and Lead” is about the tools she’s used with thousands of women to help them take big steps forward in their lives and careers.
Mohr says that some women feel they aren’t ready to take on bigger roles. The inner critic can be a powerful and inhibiting voice inside, and Mohr has developed some useful advice for breaking the cycle of self-limiting beliefs.
Here are Mohr’s ten principles that can help women (anyone, really) own their brilliance and bring it to the world:
1 Make a pact. No one else is going to build the life you want for you. This is your game. Make a pact to be in it with yourself for the long haul, as your own supportive friend at every step along the way.
2 Imagine it. What does a knock-the-ball-out-of-the-park life look like for you? Start envisioning it. That’s the beginning of having it.
3 Gasp. Start doing things that make you gasp and get the adrenaline flowing. Go for the gasps and learn how false your inner critic’s narrative really is, and how conquerable your fears.
4 Get a thick skin. If you take risks, sometimes you’ll get a standing ovation, and sometimes, people will throw tomatoes. Work on letting go of needing to be liked and needing to be universally known as “a nice person.”
5 Be an arrogant idiot. Of course I know you won’t, because you never could. But please, just be a little more of an arrogant idiot. You know those guys around the office who share their opinions without thinking, who rally everyone around their big, (often unformed) ideas? Be more like them. Even if just a bit. You can afford to move a few inches in that direction.
6 Question the voice that says “I’m not ready yet.” Jump in the sandbox now, and start playing full out. Find out just how ready you are.
7 Don’t wait for your Oscar. Don’t wait to be praised, anointed, or validated.
8 Filter advice. Most brilliant women
9 Recover and restore. If you start doing the things that make you gasp, doing what you don’t quite feel ready to do, and being more of an arrogant idiot, you are going to be stretching out of our comfort zone–a lot. Regularly do things that feel safe, cozy, and restorative.
10 Let other women know they are brilliant. Let them know what kind of brilliance you see, and why it’s so special. Call them into greater leadership and action. Let them know that they are ready.
In the spirit of rule #10, I’d like to celebrate the dedicated and talented women in my family: Sarah Jane, Tessa, Jane, Bernie, Mimi, Dee, Lori, Tara, SallieBen, Nikki, Kate, Madeline, Ella, Rhonda, Nicole, Lynette, Ashley, Zuzu, Scarlett, Blakely, Demi, Monica, Deb, Suzanne, Kristin, and Margot.
You are brilliant and you are ready.
Wishing all moms a very Happy Mother’s Day! Have a great week.
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