Already wondering how in the world you’re going to get your to-do list for 2015 accomplished? One way to tackle it is to make sure your not-to-do list is in order. 

Your not-to-do list is essentially what you need to say no to. And word choice can make a subtle but significant difference in your ability to do it.

In a research study published in the Journal of Consumer Research on the subject of Empowered Refusal, it outlines the results of word choice and mindset in using “I can’t” versus “I don’t.”

When faced with a temptation, one group of students was told to say “I can’t do X.” For example, “I can’t eat ice cream.” The other group of students was told to say “I don’t do X.” For example, “I don’t eat ice cream.”

At the end of these instructions, students answered a set of questions seemingly unrelated to the study. As they were handing in their answer sheets, they were offered a snack choice of a chocolate candy bar or a granola bar.

The students who told themselves “I can’t eat X” chose the chocolate candy bar 61 percent of the time. The students who told themselves “I don’t eat X” chose the chocolate candy bar only 36 percent of the time. This simple change in phrasing improved the odds that each person would make a more healthy food choice.

The point is our words help to frame our sense of empowerment and control. Furthermore, the words that you use create a feedback loop in your brain. “I can’t” is more of a reminder of your limitations. In comparison, “I don’t” reminds you of your control and power over the situation. It’s a phrase that emboldens and puts you in a more assertive frame of mind.

Heidi Grant Halvorson is the associate director of the Motivation Science Center at Columbia University. Here’s her explanation of the difference:

“I don’t” is experienced as a choice, so it feels empowering. It’s an affirmation of your determination and willpower. “I can’t” isn’t a choice. It’s a restriction, it’s being imposed upon you. So thinking “I can’t” undermines your sense of power and personal agency. In other words, the phrase “I don’t” is a psychologically empowering way to say no, while the phrase “I can’t” is a psychologically draining way to say no.

Health and productivity are determined by what you do, as well as what you don’t do. A small adjustments in your words, thoughts, and actions can put you in the driver’s seat of your personal and professional life and help you not only serve family, friends and co-workers better, but also achieve the goals that are most important to you.

Have a great week.